Half of a Halfling, A Fairy Tale From Palestine About A Man's Courage, Compassion, and Cleverness; Season 2, Episode 2 of Fireside Folklore with Hades

[00:00:00] [Intro music fades out as Hades speaks.]

[00:00:01] Hades: Greetings, explorers of enchanted realms and adventurers into the unknown. You’ve journeyed through the vast expanse of the podcast universe and arrived at the hearth of “Fireside Folklore with Hades”. This is the podcast where we unearth the world’s folklore, the more obscure the better, and share those tales with a divine sense of humor and panache. I am your steadfast host, Hades, keeper of secrets and historian of humanity. This week, we are making our first stop in Palestine, where its people continue to endure unspeakable atrocities brought on by human-orchestrated brutality. Though it may seem a Herculean task to try and move the needle from dehumanization towards empathy, we here are doing our part by sharing information about these people, their culture, and stories—stories that over 12,000 children, whose lives were tragically cut short, can no longer hear. Joining me on this shared quest of ensuring that the Palestinian legacy endures are my co-hosts. Persephone, my indomitable consort, whose spirit is as resilient as the ancient olive groves of Palestine. These groves, much like Persephone's spirit, have withstood the test of time and the harsh conditions of their environment, continuing to bear fruit and provide sustenance. Their roots run deep in the land, symbolizing endurance and resilience, characteristics of the Palestinian people who have had to courageously protect their land. Then, of course, there’s Hermes, my nephew and psychopomp. If you’re flummoxed by the term psychopomp, take a breath. It just means that Hermes is our divine guide across the many lands we travel, anchoring our stories in historical and cultural truths.

[00:01:43] Our tale for tonight, “Half of a Halfling”, comes from one of the only books of Palestinian folklore I could find, Speak Bird, Speak Again by Ibrahim Muhawi. Now, gather close as we embark upon a journey with a hero who did not allow his obstacles to define him, as the firelight casts a warm and inviting glow upon us all. Friends, let the story-telling begin.

[00:02:06] Persephone: Hello everyone! I hope you’ve all recovered after our latest adventure in Syria! That was one of the stories which didn’t have the happiest ending. I’m glad that this week’s tale is a bit more uplifting!

[00:02:18] Hades: Well, my dear, we hadn’t had anything particularly hair-raising since we visited the Babinda boulders when we told the Legend of Devil’s Pool, so I thought it was time to change that. Now it’s time for us to hear from our sponsor. Who is it this time, Zeus?

[00:02:33] [Sponsor music plays during Zeus’s reading of the sponsor message.]

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[00:04:20] Hades: Well, I suppose the man in our tale should have had some of these with him when he went on his journey. That might have helped him. Then again, had he had these Ambrosia Bites, then Half of a Halfling would not have been born. Now Hermes, what have you got for us this week?

[00:04:36] Hermes: Well Uncle, since we’ll be making multiple stops in Palestine, I thought I could focus on one fact each time we journey here. Let’s begin by talking about the olive tree.

[00:04:46] Did you know that the olive tree is considered the national tree of Palestine? These resilient, gnarled beauties have graced the Mediterranean landscape for millennia, their silver-green leaves and pitted fruits a symbol of Palestinian identity and perseverance.

[00:05:00] In the rolling hills around Bethlehem, Hebron, and Nablus, generations of Palestinian families have tended to their ancient olive groves, a practice that dates back over 5,000 years! The average lifespan of an olive tree is 500 years. That’s half of a millennium! The gnarled trunks of these trees have born witness to the ebb and flow of civilizations in this ancient cradle of humanity since time immemorial.

[00:05:23] Each autumn, Palestinian families would gather to harvest the olives, a festival of sorts celebrated with song, dance, and savory dishes flavored with the golden oil pressed from the year's bounty. The olive and its oil are woven into the very fabric of Palestinian culture – from food to ancient remedies, soap-making, and even religious rituals.

[00:05:42] So the next time you enjoy a briny olive or a drizzle of fruity olive oil, let your mind wander to those ancient Palestinian groves. For in that simple fruit lies a connection to a rich heritage that has flowered and endured through the ages, as timeless as the trees themselves.

[00:05:57] Hades: And I thought Athena gave olives to us all. She must have a good spin doctor on staff. Now, as we have done with other episodes, let us pay our respects to the people of Palestine by listening to their anthem, “Fida'I”.

[00:06:34] [National anthem of Palestine plays.]

[00:06:53] Hades: I’ve heard this before and hearing it again is no less stirring. For our tale tonight, we will be joined by Ares playing the role of Ali, Aphrodite playing the role of his wife Fatimeh, Apollo playing the role of the twins Abdul and Ahmed, Dionysus playing the role of half of a halfling, Poseidon playing the role of the he-ghouls, Artemis playing the role of the she-ghouls, and Chronos in the role of the Djinn of the Mountain.

[00:07:26] Zeus: Chronos? Brother, do you think it wise to have our father involved with this podcast?

[00:07:32] Hades: I have had the chance to speak with him whilst in Tartarus, and he is not what he seems.

[00:07:37] Zeus: And you did this without my permission?

[00:07:39] Hades: Brother, not now and not here. Let us begin our tale.

[00:07:43] [Middle Eastern music fades out as Hades begins the story.]

[00:07:45] Hades: Once upon a time, many long centuries ago, there lived a man named Ali who had two wives. One of his wives was a beautiful noblewoman by the name of Fatimeh. The other wife was actually his second cousin once removed, and unfortunately for her, Ali would often be dismissive of her. One day, Fatimeh said,

[00:08:02] Aphrodite: Ali, wouldn’t it be wonderful to have a child?

[00:08:06] Ares: Fatimeh, my dear, we have gone down this road before. Allah has not graced us with a child. There’s not much we can do.

[00:08:13] Aphrodite: There is where you are mistaken, my dear Ali. For you see, I was speaking with the local wise woman and she said that there was a way, but it was a most dangerous path.

[00:08:23] Ares: Then what, dear wife, did you learn? For I wish to see you happy and if that means I must bring down the sun and moon for us to have children, then I shall do it.

[00:08:32] Aphrodite: Oh, it is nothing as difficult as all that, but you must travel many miles, and pass through a forest which is the home to many ghouls. The wise woman said that only they would know how to bring a child to my barren womb.

[00:08:45] Ares: Very well, wife. Then I shall go.

[00:08:48] Hades: Now Ali wanted a successor to whom he could give his merchanting business, and therefore, he made the decision to see if he could bring a child to both of his wives. That way, if one failed to bear him a son, the other might and provide him with an heir.

[00:09:01] Ares: Fatimeh, I shall go into the forest and find out how to bring children into our home. Don’t worry. I’ll be back as soon as I can.

[00:09:08] Hades: After a final farewell, Ali headed towards this mysterious forest.

[00:09:13] Though the journey took many days, it was rather uneventful. However, no sooner had he entered the forest then he was greeted by a ghoul.

[00:09:20] Ares: Peace to you, my brother. How are you on this fine day?

[00:09:24] Poseidon: Peace, eh? Had you said anything else, then I would have eaten you up! I’m doing well, thank you for asking. What brings you into this forest? This is the home of the ghouls, you know!

[00:09:34] Ares: My wife, Fatimeh, would like to have a child, but though we have tried for years, we have not been at all successful. A wise woman told her that you would have the answers.

[00:09:44] Poseidon: Not I, but perhaps my brother would be able to help you. He is older and more experienced than I.

[00:09:50] Hades: So, with that, Ali continued on his journey, going deeper into the dark and foreboding forest. Several hours later, he was approached by another ghoul.

[00:10:00] Ares: Peace be with you, my brother. How are you on this blessed day?

[00:10:03] Poseidon: Peace, you say? It’s very wise of you to wish me peace, for had you given any other greeting, then I would have crunched upon your bones. I am doing quite well. What brings you into this forest?

[00:10:15] Ares: My darling wife Fatimeh and I have wanted a child for years now, but we have been unable to conceive. A wise woman said that you might be able to help us bring life into this world.

[00:10:25] Poseidon: Life into this world? Ha! That, my friend, is beyond my capabilities, but if you continue on into the forest, at its heart you will find my sister, and if anybody can help you, it is she.

[00:10:36] Ares: Thank you, brother ghoul. My gratitude knows no bounds.

[00:10:40] Hades: Ali continued his journey, but night was about to fall and he wasn’t sure if he would be able to make it before it became too dark for travel. Wolves began to howl off in the distance, and a shiver ran down his spine. There were no huts or cottages in sight, for nobody wanted to live in a forest filled with ghouls. When he thought he was going to be forced to stay the night and continue his journey in the morning, he came upon a she-ghoul.

[00:11:04] Artemis: Who dares to tread into my territory?!

[00:11:06] Ares: Peace, sister ghoul. I come in peace.

[00:11:09] Hades: Ali gently took first the right and then the left hand of Sister Ghoul in his own and politely kissed them.

[00:11:15] Artemis: You have kissed my right hand and my left. You have respected me and my family. You could not have made it here if you had done anything less. What is it that you seek?

[00:11:26] Ares: I wish to have a son. Neither of my wives has been able to bear a child. Please, wise and noble ghoul, tell me how I may bring forth life into this world.

[00:11:37] Artemis: It is simple. Behind me, you’ll see a pomegranate tree. Pick a pomegranate for each of your wives. Ensure that they eat the entire fruit, then each of them will bear you a son.

[00:11:47] Ares: Thank you, lady ghoul.

[00:11:48] Hades: Without wasting another moment, Ali walked over to the pomegranate tree and plucked two of the ripest fruit he could find. Then, he turned and began heading out of the forest, eager to return home so that he could give the pomegranates to his wives. However, as his journey home progressed, Ali began to feel hungry.

[00:12:07] Ares: Surely it won’t do any harm if I eat a bit of one of the pomegranates. What’s the worse that can happen?

[00:12:12] Hades: Convincing himself that there would be no consequences if he ate some of the fruit, Ali took one of the pomegranates and split it in two. Taking the smaller half, he ate it with gusto.

[00:12:25] Ares: I’ll give the half of a pomegranate to my second cousin once removed. She won’t begrudge me for having gotten hungry. And besides, Fatimeh deserves the whole pomegranate. She is my first wife, after all.

[00:12:36] Hades: After making it home safely the next day, Ali gave the pomegranates to his wives, with the cut fruit going to his second cousin once removed. Both wives became pregnant and nine months later, sons were born.

[00:12:47] Aphrodite: How beautiful! We have two lovely twin boys. Ali, you are my hero! Ahmed and Abdul, that’s what we shall name them.

[00:12:56] Ares: Yes, those two are angels! But the one my second wife bore … ugh! How could such a creature exist?

[00:13:03] Hades: You see, the second wife, who had been given half of a pomegranate, had given birth to a child who was but half of a human: one eye, one ear, one arm, and a single leg, then given the name Half of a Halfling. The boys grew up into strong lads, and once they were old enough to begin helping their father with his merchanting business, he said,

[00:13:22] Ares: Today, I am going to begin testing you to see who will become my heir. Since you were all born at the same time, I cannot cede my lands to the eldest child, as tradition dictates that I do, so we shall embark on a series of contests instead. First, let us see how well you fare at hunting. I would like you to chase down and kill the largest deer you can.

[00:13:46] Hades: No sooner did they reach the forest then Ahmed and Abdul turned to Half of a Halfling and said,

[00:13:52] Apollo: You’ll just slow us down. Go hunt for a deer somewhere else!

[00:13:55] Dionysus: Very well. I shall see you both with a deer by nightfall.

[00:13:59] Hades: Within an hour, Half of a Halfling had brought down a large buck and had managed to sling it onto his back. He returned to the designated meeting spot and waited for his brothers, but they did not return.

[00:14:10] Dionysus: I wonder where they could be. Is it possible that they left without me? Perhaps. I know my family wishes I hadn’t been born. Yet, I don’t understand how they could have left so quickly.

[00:14:21] Hades: As Half of a Halfling continued to wait, he began to hear calls for help.

[00:14:25] Apollo: Help! Help! Please help!

[00:14:27] Dionysus: Ahmed? Abdul? May Allah have mercy on them! They sound terrified.

[00:14:32] Hades: The young man headed back into the forest, following the sound of the calls. He soon arrived to see his brothers cowering in a tree, unable to come down due to the large buck with a formidable rack upon his head, posturing in a very aggressive way. Half of a Halfling, seeing his brothers in distress, called out to them.

[00:14:51] Dionysus: Brothers, what seems to have happened?

[00:14:53] Apollo: The deer has chased us to this tree. We didn’t want to get killed by his antlers so we had no choice but to climb up here.

[00:14:59] Dionysus: Brothers, I will help you hunt this deer, but on one condition. You must allow me to brand you, so that our father will know who truly prevailed in this challenge.

[00:15:10] Apollo: Very well, Half of a Halfling. We agree to your terms. Please, just get us out of this tree!

[00:15:15] Hades: With a nod, Half of a Halfling swiftly took aim with his bow and arrow, striking the deer with a single, precise shot. The buck fell to the ground, and the twins carefully climbed down from the tree.

[00:15:26] Dionysus: Now, brothers, as we agreed, I will brand you both on your lower back, so that our father will know the truth of this hunt.

[00:15:33] Hades: The twins sighed with resignation, and Half of a Halfling branded them both. The three brothers then returned home with the deer. When they presented their catches to their father, Ahmed and Abdul tried to convince him that they had prevailed.

[00:15:48] Ares: My sons, I am impressed by your hunting skills. However, both of you appear to have a full quiver of arrows. I must know the truth. Half of a Halfling, what do you have to say?

[00:15:58] Dionysus: Father, I ask that you have Ahmed and Abdul show you their lower backs. The answer you are searching for will be there.

[00:16:05] Ares: An interesting request. Nevertheless, Abdul! Ahmed! Show me your lower backs.

[00:16:11] Hades: Feeling embarrassed about having lied and finding themselves unable to wriggle out of this predicament, Abdul and Ahmed raised their tunics.

[00:16:18] Ares: Well done, Half of a Halfling. You have proven yourself in this challenge. But there are still two more tasks to complete before I can name my heir.

[00:16:27] Hades: For the second challenge, Ali decided to test his sons' compassion and integrity.

[00:16:32] Ares: My sons, for this challenge, you must work for the Djinn of the Mountain. This djinn can take on any form, so be careful. If you are able to please the djinn, you should earn yourselves a handsome reward. That way, you may still enjoy prosperity, whether or not you become my heir.

[00:16:49] Hades: And so, filled with the confidence only youth and privilege can bestow, Abdul and Ahmed set off towards the Mountain of the Djinn, their hearts light, their steps swift.

[00:17:00] Upon reaching the foot of the mountain, they encountered a frail, old man, bent over a heavy load of firewood.

[00:17:06] Chronos: Oh, young masters, would you help an old man with his burden? The path ahead is long and my bones weary.

[00:17:13] Apollo: Why should we, who are destined for greatness, waste our time on such menial tasks? We seek the Djinn of the Mountain, not the burdens of the old and feeble. If you are wise, old man, tell us where we may find the Djinn, so we may fulfill our task and claim our reward.

[00:17:28] Chronos: Ah, young masters, so eager for reward yet so reluctant for effort. The Djinn you seek stands before you, in need of assistance. But since you have refused, you shall leave as you came, unburdened by riches or success. However, for your arrogance, I curse you thus. May your steps be heavy, and every journey feel longer than the last.

[00:17:49] Hades: Shocked, Abdul and Ahmed could do nothing but watch as the old man vanished in a whirl of smoke, leaving them feeling the weight of their mistake.

[00:17:58] Meanwhile, Half of a Halfling, upon hearing of the same challenge, approached the mountain with a heart full of determination and humility. As he climbed, he too encountered the djinn, now in the guise of a thirsty traveler.

[00:18:11] Chronos: Young man, could you spare a moment to share your water with a parched soul? My journey has been long, and I fear I may not reach my destination without aid.

[00:18:21] Dionysus: Of course, friend. One must always aid those in need, for the road is long and fraught with hardship for us all.

[00:18:29] Hades: After quenching his thirst, the traveler revealed his true form as the Djinn, much to Half of a Halfling's astonishment.

[00:18:36] Chronos: For your kindness and humility, I grant you a boon. This ring shall bring you good fortune in times of need. Go forth with my blessing, and may your heart always be as generous as it is today.

[00:18:48] With gratitude, Half of a Halfling continued his journey back to his father, the magical ring snug on his finger.

[00:18:54] Upon their return, Ali looked upon his sons. Abdul and Ahmed returned empty-handed, their strides heavy, a physical manifestation of their curse. Half of a Halfling, however, returned with a broad smile and a joyful heart.

[00:19:07] Ares: My sons, it seems that your adventures have taught you varied lessons. Abdul and Ahmed, let this be a reminder that arrogance and a lack of compassion lead to nothing but hardship. And you, Half of a Halfling, have once again shown your worth, not just in skill but in heart.

[00:19:26] Hades: Ali declared Half of a Halfling the winner of the second challenge. Only one more task remained before an heir would be declared.

[00:19:34] Ares: Now my children, I wish for you to stay in the home of a she-ghoul named Amira. You see, none but the cleverest can escape it alive. I wish for my heir to be hard-working, compassionate, and clever—all of the hallmarks of a successful businessman. Be careful, for if you allow her to trick you, she may have you for supper.

[00:19:53] Artemis: Welcome, young men. You may stay the night, but be warned – many who have slept here have never woken up again.

[00:19:59] Dionysus: Understood, Lady Amira. Now, before we settle in for the night, I must tell you something. When I am fast asleep, the room will be silent. If you hear me snoring, it means that I am still awake.

[00:20:10] Hades: As the brothers settled in for the night, Amira crept into the room, intent on devouring the sleeping brothers. But Half of a Halfling was snoring so loudly that Amira knew he was wide awake.

[00:20:22] Artemis: I’ll try again in an hour.

[00:20:24] Hades: Again, she crept into the room, prepared to devour the three men, but Half of a Halfling’s snoring continued without a stop in sight.

[00:20:32] Artemis: Oh, what am I to do? I’ll have to go hunt a deer!

[00:20:36] Hades: In a rage, Amira left her home and caught a doe which she ate. By the time she returned, the sun had risen and the men had all awakened.

[00:20:43] Dionysus: Wake up, brothers! We must flee, for the she-ghoul intended to eat us!

[00:20:47] Hades: The three brothers escaped the she-ghoul's home and returned to their father. Ali, impressed by Half of a Halfling's bravery and quick thinking, declared him the winner of the final challenge and named him his heir.

[00:21:01] Ares: Half of a Halfling, you have proven yourself worthy through your wit, humility, and courage. You shall inherit my business and lead our family to prosperity.

[00:21:10] Hades: From that day forward, Half of a Halfling was respected by all, and the family lived happily ever after, with Half of a Halfling at the helm of their merchanting business.

[00:21:20] Persephone: Wow! That was incredible! Thank you for choosing such a great story, my love.

[00:21:24] Hermes: And one with a happy ending.

[00:21:27] Hades: Of course. During this season, we will be highlighting Palestinian folklore that demonstrates resilience, resolve, and overcoming. Now, what have you chosen for the featured recipe this evening, my dear?

[00:21:38] Persephone: Tonight, I’ve decided to try a new falafel recipe. This has been adapted for our readers from Palestine in a Dish, a food blog where you can find more yummy and authentic recipes to try.

[00:21:51] In today's flavorful journey, we explore the rich history of falafel, a beloved street food that has captured hearts far beyond its Middle Eastern origins. Particularly in Palestine, falafel is not just a dish; it's a cultural emblem, representing resilience, community, and the sharing of joy through cuisine. This delectable deep-fried ball, crafted from chickpeas and herbs, demonstrates how the simplest of ingredients can create the most delectable of dishes. As we dive into this recipe, we celebrate not only the flavors of falafel but also its enduring legacy across generations.

[00:22:27] Here is what you will need:

[00:22:29] • 1 lb (450g) or about 2.5 cups dried chickpeas (hummus)

[00:22:35] • One bunch fresh parsley, stems removed

[00:22:38] • One large onion, peeled

[00:22:41] • 3-4 Garlic cloves, peeled

[00:22:43] • One medium potato, peeled

[00:22:45] • 1 teaspoon (5g) cumin

[00:22:47] • 1 teaspoon (5g) coriander

[00:22:51] • 2 teaspoons (10g) baking powder

[00:22:54] • 1 teaspoon (5g) salt

[00:22:56] • 3-4 cups (720-960 ml) of oil for frying, grapeseed or avocado work well

[00:23:06] Here is what you will do:

[00:23:08] 1. Soak the chickpeas in water, fully covered, for up to eight hours or overnight. This is crucial for achieving the perfect texture.

[00:23:17] 2. After soaking, rinse the chickpeas and place them in a food processor. Add the parsley, onion, garlic, potato (which adds a delightful crunch), cumin, coriander, baking powder, and salt. Blend until you form a smooth paste, embodying the essence of falafel's flavor profile.

[00:23:36] 3. With the mixture ready, shape it into balls using your hands, a falafel tool, or even an ice cream spoon for uniformity. This step is where your culinary creativity shines.

[00:23:48] 4. Heat the oil in a pan over high heat until very hot. Fry the falafel in batches of 4-5, depending on the size of your pan, for about 6-8 minutes. Keep an eye on them, turning occasionally, until they achieve a golden brown hue. Once done, transfer them to a paper towel to drain any excess oil.

[00:24:08] Falafel, with its crisp exterior and tender heart, is traditionally enjoyed in a sandwich, wrapped in a warm pita, and adorned with tahini sauce, pickles, and tomatoes. However, you can also enjoy them in a salad or on their own with a bit of tahini or hummus.

[00:24:23] If you have any questions or would like to share pictures of your dish, please E-mail me at Persephone@firesidefolklorewithhades.com.

[00:24:29] Hades: That sounds delicious! Although, I must admit, I’d love to try my falafel with some mutabal.

[00:24:36] Persephone: Oh Hades! My love! You’re always coming up with something unique. What is mutabal?

[00:24:41] Hades: Baba Ghanoush, my dear. An excellent eggplant dip, and sometimes even with pine nuts.

[00:24:46] Persephone: Mmmm! Well, we’ll have to make some next time we visit Palestine.

[00:24:50] Hades: I’ll hold you to that, my dear. Now, before we enjoy our Palestinian meal, let’s end our episode as we always do, with our legendary Lightning Round. Zeus, take it away, brother.

[00:25:07] Zeus: All right, listeners! Here’s how it works. I will ask three questions about tonight’s episode. The first person to correctly answer my questions will receive a $25 gift certificate to Shop Palestine, an online store selling Palestinian goods. To participate, please send an E-mail with your answers to Zeus@firesidefolklorewithhades.com and put “Lightning Round with Zeus, Episode 2” in the subject line. Be sure to tell me your name or pseudonym and where you’re listening from if you’d like us to acknowledge your win in a future episode. Are you ready? Let’s go!

[00:25:49] 1. Name one of the flavors available for Ambrosia Bites.

[00:25:52] 2. What is Palestine’s national tree?

[00:25:55] 3. After Persephone gave us a recipe for falafel, Hades said he wanted some Mutabal. What is that?

[00:26:00] Hades: Well, that’s all for tonight, folks. We hope you enjoyed tonight’s retelling of “Half of a Halfling” from the State of Palestine. Next time, we’ll be journeying to South Africa to hear the tale of “The Sticks of Justice”. As the keeper of secrets and the historian of humanity, I remind you that your own stories have the power to shape the world. Until next time, be the author of your own extraordinary tale.

[00:26:23] Persephone: Goodnight everyone!

[00:26:24] Hermes: Goodnight everyone! Stay curious!