PSA: Hades On Mortal Gratitude and Folly; A Nod to Thanksgiving and a Warning Against Phishing Scams
Send over your dead SMS messages.
Greetings, listeners!
In this completely unplanned interlude (whose true purpose will become clear shortly), I wish to take a moment to express my gratitude to the patrons of this podcast—those loyal listeners who gather by the fireside to hear the stories of old. Your time and dedication mean more to me than any mortal treasure ever could. It is your continued presence that motivates me to unearth tales from all corners of the globe and strive to make this the finest podcast the Underworld can produce, despite my ongoing technological aggravations—of which The Golden Pail was a prime example.
Some shades in Tartarus, thinking themselves clever, disrupted the balance of sound effects and dialogue in that episode, necessitating several re-uploads. To those who may have downloaded it early, know that a more polished version now awaits you, free from (most) Eldritch mischief.
Now, to the main purpose of this episode: I recently received a mortal scammer’s missive attempting to part me from the secrets of my realm. This absurdity inspired me to reach out and remind you that my website collects no personal information, nor shall I ever, under any circumstances, reach out to you unless you have done so first. Any email claiming to be from me should be treated as filth worthy of Tartarus—and cast straight into the abyss where it belongs.
With that, I wish you a day of joy, connection, and apple pie—for even the Lord of the Underworld has his favorites.
Greetings, listeners! On this day, what some recognize as Thanksgiving, I wanted to express my gratitude to you, the loyal listeners who enjoy the stories of old. With every episode, you show up, whether it's perfectly polished or rushed and in need of some re-uploads. Yes, I'm looking at you, Golden Pail.
I appreciate your patronage, and no, that doesn't mean some ten-dollar contribution on Patreon. That means patronage as it was in the ancient days, when patronage meant loyalty, devotion, and shared purpose. In those times, a god could be the patron of a city, an art, or even the treasures hidden beneath the earth.
I myself was called Plouton—the giver of wealth—honored as the patron of all that was buried and unseen: gems, metals, and the fertile soil which gave life.
In that spirit, your patronage—your time, attention, and engagement with these stories—is a treasure I value more than obsidian or gold.
I would also like to take this moment to remind you, dear listeners, to stay vigilant. The Underworld, after all, is no stranger to trickery, and I recently received an email of such absurdity it made even Sisyphus pause mid-push. Can you believe some mortal had the audacity to tell me that our website was getting questions from people who didn't clearly understand our refund policy? Refunds! As though the Underworld ever gives refunds!
Scammers walk among the living, seeking to deceive, and while this message targeted me, it’s a timely reminder to safeguard your own domains—both digital and mortal. Should any of you, by some unlikely twist of the Fates, receive a letter claiming to be from me, know that I do not (and never shall), collect your personal information on my website, so unless you explicitly reach out to me with dead letters or to participate in the Lightning Round with Zeus, you can assume that any such letter is a scam and should be thrown into Tartarus, where it firmly belongs.
With that, I thank you for your unwavering support and your patience, even when an episode like The Golden Pail decides to test mine. May your day, whether you celebrate or simply enjoy the quiet, be filled with warmth and light. From the depths of the Underworld, I remain your steadfast storyteller and servant, Hades.